Great Adventure

Well, facebook doesn't lie, I have been on a trip. I went to London and Paris for a couple weeks, and I had a pleasant experience. Let me list why I like it there:

London:
1) No one's clothes match, no one cares.
2) Everyone's hair is frizzy, I fit right in.
3) The Tower of London has moving sidewalks in front of the crown jewels, so you can just go around and around and around, admiring all the gems they've stolen by exploiting the Africans.
4) People still live in castles.
5) They get free healthcare (never mind the 25% taken out of their paychecks in taxes)
6) When there is an accident on their freeways, nothing gets moved out of the way, the road just shuts down for hours.
7) Their broadway shows are incredible.
8) Everyone loves Michael Cain.
9) The handsome English men that walk you to the subway in the morning and think that you have a great accent and tell you your boyfriend is the luckiest man in the world.
10) The double decker bus tours
11) The art museums have paintings/sculptures that you've learned about in school
12) The subway doors close on people, it's scary to get your head shut in it

Paris:
1) The bread
2) The croissants
3) The crepes
4) The pastries
5) Bartering is awesome - one store owner said he'd give me the merchandise for cheaper if I'd got to dinner with him (in the end, I got it for the price I wanted, and I didn't even go to dinner with him, we decided I would go with him the next time I was in Paris)
6) Notre Dame
7) The Rodin Museum
8) Everyone speaks French. . .it's pretty confusing
9) All you have to do is be American to be invited onto a French TV Show
10) There are A LOT of stairs. . .such great exercise without even trying.

That's about it. . .I actually have to get back to work. But it was fun, would have been more fun if any of you had taken me up on my offer and come with me. ;)